What's That, Musk? Tell Me What's A Happenin'?

 Can you tell this blog post is about Elon? (Does the title tell you I watched Jesus Christ Superstar over Easter?) As a northern Canadian with strong feelings about the very rich, and the even richer, I think Elon has too much money. Don't get me wrong (don'tcha get me wrong, now) (yes, more JC) There's nothing wrong with being mildly rich. But waking up as the wealthiest person on the planet? I can only imagine how that would feel. I hope I'd be horrifed. You don't get there by being Mr./Ms. Nice Guy.

Aside from a much humbler financial status, Elon and I have some things in common. I'm not on the autism spectrum (although I can't take loud noises or weird smells) but I know what it's like to be low on the teenage status pole. And while his family was financially comfortable, and though he might have been a cute kid, I can't imagine he was all that popular on the junior high dance floor. Some of us weren't  cool back then. Some of us had no idea at all how to be number one in that world. (Or number 10.) And some of us were terrible at Dodge Ball. 

You are miles smarter than me, Elon. Your geek factor is a tad higher, too. But I get how it feels to be the odd person in the room. In spite of your success, you might feel you still have something to prove. But that doesn't mean you should take over Twitter. I wouldn't have thought much about it if you hadn't openly supported the truckers taking over Ottawa in February. You're not Canadian. You don't get a say. Yes, you believe in free speech, but does that mean anyone can make up anything and we all should just nod our heads in agreement? No! Does that mean that when a few thousand people want to overthrow the government, you have the right to say, hell ya? I don't think so. 

Instead of spending 44 Billion Dollars on a social platform where people tweet their opinions, why don't you do some good with your money? You could start by saving the planet from the rest of us. You could support programs for the poor in the US and around the world. You want to be king? That's the way to do it. 

I'm not a huge Twitter fan. It's such a frenetic world that by the time I realize I agree with someone, I'm the 10,000th person to hit the heart button, or reply, 'I agree!' I wish you'd decided to lead the world in a great direction instead of spending your money on this. Does your mother approve? Wouldn't she rather you take care of people instead? Maybe she doesn't care. Or she's not around anymore. If not, I'm sorry. 

While you're planning to open Twitter up to every wacko opinion, you know what occupies President Biden? I picture him kneeling by his bed at night praying for Donald Trump to die first. 

"Just let him die, God. Let the Republicans go back to normal. Like the days when half of them understood science. Let Marjorie Taylor Greene decide to retire instead of screaming, 'Let the dimwits inherit the earth!' 

And while I'm on this rant, I want someone to kill that fu**er Putin. (Yes, that's my prayer. But so far, God has refused to be my hitman.) You know what the president of Ukraine is praying for? 'Please, let us still have a country in 2023. And ask the world to get off its ass and help us.'

Buying Twitter feels like an Austin Power move. You want to hold the world hostage for One Million Dollars! Sorry...44 billion dollars. You'll show them, all right. You know what would be really great? Buying the Amazon Rain forest and protecting it forever. You built the Tesla...you must care about lowering carbon on planet Earth. I bet you could purchase the Congo Rain forest, too. 

Imagine being the person who saves the planet. You'd have the status of a saint. Instead, buying Twitter puts you in the company of Rupert Murdoch. Are you a Fox news guy? Will you hire Tucker Carlson to be your wingman on Twitter? 

Be a hero. Do something great with all that money. Help educate people around the world, or invest it in finding a cure for every kind of cancer. If you decide to do that, you might even get your own musical. So, don't be like Rupert. Be like Jesus. You don't have to lay down and die for us. You just have to change your heart. 

(For more left-wing rancor, follow me on Twitter.) 

(Ha ha.)

Deliver Us From Evil - A Bystander's Guide to a Better World

 Nobody wants to be the victim of evil deeds. (Unless you're in a certain kind of club and you're reeeeeaaally looking forward to it.) Most of us don't want to be evil, but it might be possible to wander into evil territory without being aware of it. It's like being lost in a forest and instead of paying attention to the stars, or the sun, or even the signs saying, 'This Way Out' we dig our heels in and go our own way. It's good to be independent, to make your own decisions. But we don't all have the same skill set. We can't all be wise in the same ways, or know everything there is to know about keeping the world, or even ourselves safe. So, here is a checklist of things to consider when making decisions that affect everyone.

1. Believe an expert over yourself. Though I'm inclined at two AM to consult Dr. Google about a strange pain in my chest/foot/abdomen/head (yes, I've googled all of the above) I finally succumb to common sense and make a doctor appointment. I may have a better diet and exercise program than my doctor, but I don't know if I've got an ulcer, a blocked artery, or if the pain in my stomach is all in my head. My doctor will test for it. She has the equipment and she knows the right people. This applies to all experts. Climate scientists, (real ones with degrees and everything) journalists (the ones with training, not the guys in their yard or their trucks who will give you their opinion on everything from Covid to the war on Ukraine.) If you see a fake backdrop and the 'anchor' says, 'Over to you, Dave,' and Dave is waiting in his pickup to give you the 'real news,' think again. Dave might be your guy who can build you a new garage, or fix your plumbing issues, or repair your colon (but only if he's a surgeon.) He's not the right person to tell you the straight up truth about the world. 

2. If you can't find main stream media (people who've studied journalism) to back up your views, and you find yourself searching the 'alternate web,' realize this. You and a number of your acquaintances have not made discoveries that the rest of the world is blind to; you've not stumbled on hidden truths about conspiracies in the government, unless you're talking about North Korea. But even then, they make no bones about where they stand. Governments are filled with blabbermouths, just like the rest of the population. They cannot keep any of the following secrets: Aliens are living among us, Bill Gates is microchipping everyone, big Pharma is the new, evil empire. Am I always a fan of the pharmaceutical world? No. But we'd all be dying in our forties and fifties, or even as children, if we didn't have the medicine we need.

3. The good old days were not so great. Yes, baby boomers loved their childhoods for many good reasons. Lots of freedom, tons of people your age in the neighborhood, plentiful jobs, cheap schooling and affordable housing. But women were harrassed as a matter of course at work, at school, and while out walking. Many people had to hide who they were, because getting called 'Dyke, ' 'Fairy' or worse was the result of being brave and coming out. And that ended in a beating or even death for quite a few people. Racism was accepted. Indigenous people, immigrants, anyone who looked or dressed differently was name called on a regular basis or put into re-education schools, so while the rest of us were living large, they were stuck in a dystopian world of pain and hopelessness. For many of us, the world feels harder than when we were kids. But that's because we were living in la la land. Most of us were learning not to litter. That was the extent of our concern for the environment. How many of us noticed the missing indigenous children in our schools? Not me.

4. Stop villifying politicians. We don't agree with the men and women we didn't vote for, but the vast majority are doing their best. Nobody is perfect, and while you may not agree with their policies or their views on how to make the world a better place, give them a tiny bit of credit. I'm not talking about the politicians living in crazy town: Donald Trump, (for obvious reasons) Marjorie Taylor Greene (guns don't kill people...murderers kill people) Kim Jong Un, leader for life in North Korea. And Putin. (If you believe that Ukraine is attacking Russia, and Putin is innocent, please check back to number 1.)

5. Think about your heroes. What would they be doing today? How would they be helping make the world a better place? You know you've fallen short  (unless they're Stalin or Hitler) if you're one of the reasons medical staff are not encouraged to wear their uniforms out of the hospital.  To be a person willing to berate or attack someone trying to save lives is not heroic. (If this is you, re-read 1.)

6. We're all in this together, but climate change is hardest on those who've done the least to cause it. People of Somalia and Sudan are in a serious drought caused by rising CO2 levels. I drive a car that needs oil and gas, so I get that we still need the stuff. But encourage your government rep to be investing in alternative energies. Solar energy is 100% cheaper than it was in the mid-seventies. If we fund creative people, they just might save us from ourselves.

7. Know that everyone is undergoing hardships you and I know nothing about. If we practice peacefulness and forgiveness, maybe the favour will be returned. If we want a better world, we need to bring kindness to our relationships with each other. Let's be more than bystanders--let's deliver each other from evil. (Except for the ones on the way to that club. Let them have their good time.)